


The secrets no one knows

by KiriJones



Series: Oneshots and drabbles [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Foreshadowing, Gen, Soul Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-06
Updated: 2016-11-06
Packaged: 2018-08-29 08:59:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8483329
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiriJones/pseuds/KiriJones
Summary: Steve Rogers is marked with words the run down his shield arm. Words that brand him as destined for someone somewhere out in the world. Sharon Carter bares no such words. She is a blank canvas who chooses to love a man the universe had Marked for someone else. She loves him but fears that one day he'll leave her behind. Steve cares for Sharon but a treacherous part of his heart whispers and dreams for something more.





	

 

The Words that Mark him appeared sometime when he was under in the ice. He remembers thinking back when he was young that no one was meant for him, scrawny ill boy. He remembers waking up and seeing them on his arm. He remembers the feelings of wanting and yearning. Yet here he lays belies a beautiful woman he cares for deeply. She is everything he could ever want. They are in a committed relationship and he is happy. Yet a part of his heart hisses and yearns for something more.

the Words on his arm are a bold and loopy script that makes him think his Soulmate is a strong and fierce person. They mark him and are precious to him. Yet it has been almost six years Since he awake and nothing. He has not heard his words spoken. A part of him wonders if they are even alive but the words are as black as night so he knows they are alive. ,aye they are old and were born too early for him.

He chose Sharon because she is just and believes in freedom. She is committed to her country and job and people. She reminds him of Peggy. She makes him want to a good man.

 

 

Sometimes he dreams that he is drowning. It is not like falling into the ocean. The cold and ice nearly killed him and even to this day he avoids the cold whenever he can. No this is different. He feels like he is sinking with his eyes wide open. Sinking deeper into the water and he does not feel panic at this sensation. Instead it is welcomed. The current is calming and it feels like he is floating and flying all at once. He is weightless and when he looks up he can see the ripples on the surface and even farther still he can see the clouds and the sky. He feels at peace.

And then Steve wakes up at the feeling of peace is gone. The dreams first begin to happen when he wakes up in a world full of strangers and change. They do not occur often but when they do he welcomes the feelings they give him. They make him feel connected to something even if the feeling is somewhat morbid.

When he and Sharon fist explore a relationship the dreams seem to slip away in a way he can't describe. But then they come back with a vengeance and every other night he dreams of the ocean and the sky and the feeling of weightlessness that seems to settle into his bones.

He does not know what the dreams mean but some part of him whispers that he is seeing through the eyes of someone else. Someone who bears his Words. Someone out there in the great wide yonder. He tries not to let it affect him but deep down he knows that is jot hit way the world works.

A much as he and Sharon want to pretend that his Words mean nothing one day almost four years after he woke up something happens that changes everything. It is a normal day and he is in SHIELD headquarters and walking down the hall with Tony and Natasha when it happens. One minute he is talking about team training and the the next he is struggling to breathe and it feels like his heart is about to explode.

Spots begin to appear in the corner of his eyes and he collapses again through wall. Tony is at his side clutching his arm and soon he and Natasha try to drag him into the infirmary to Bruce. Steve ignore it all and instead feels a dread forming into the bottom of his stomach. He pushes aside their arms and instead pulls at his sleeve and much to his horror the fierce and dark lettering that has Marked him since he awoke has change. His Words are always as black as night. Instead now they are half faded ; a muted gray. He hears Tony's gasp and the horror grows until he faints.

Later he awakens into the infirmary with Bruce taking his vitals and learns his Words are almost all but faded. They are barely outlines Dan almost nothing is left. Sharon is at his side and talking to him and Steve can't find himself to care. His Soulmate is out there possibly dead.

Are they alone? Are they in pain? Were they loved? These questions and more fill his mind and leave little room for anything else. He listens though when Bruce sends Sharon outside of the room and talks to him in his quiet and sutured tone. Bruce tells him that a reaction like this to a unconsummated bond is rare and that is very likely his Soulmate is dead. Bruce says that he needs to prepare for the inevitable.

That night he dreams of the ice and the cold. That is also the night he refuses to give up on them. Wherever they are and whomever they may be Steve Rogers prays to a God he has long stopped believing in that they survive. He needs them to live. He needs them to be ok. Three long days pass and they seem like an eternity. During those three days nothing exists outside of his Words. Sharon al its seems to cease fire vein occur to him. These three days are hell and make him yearn for it all to end.

Pone thr fourth day he awakens to find the Words are darker than they were the night before. He runs to Bruce who looks shocked. And loosely but surely they darken until once more they a re as black as night. And Steve feels a part of himself settle. That night he dreams not of drowning but of flying and he knows that they are alright.

After the even he and Sharon ignore that it ever happened. Tony tries to talk about it more than once but he refuses to speak of it. But after that days sometimes he will run his hand over the Words that mark him and he will Breathe in deep and look out at the ocean and he will feel the peace fill him. It is a peace Sharon is never able to give him.

 

 

After it happens Steve begins to dream of something else besides drowning and drifting away. The dream always involves the same person but the scenarios are different. Sometime he sees a house by the sea and other time he is holding a figure asleep in his arms. Other times the laughter of children rings out and he sees kids running around with a dog and something swells up in his heart and he doesn't want to awaken from the dream. And there is always a woman in the dreams.

She is shorter than him with pale skin. Long wavy strawberry blonde hair caps her head. Her laughter is infectious and her smile is blinding. He remembers these facts as they are embedded in his minds eye. But he never quite remembers he color of her eyes or what her face looks like, it is blurry like a half remembered memory from his childhood.

These dreams haunt him and make him remover thr tales hi smoother always used to tell him about Soulmates and connection that existed between them. Tales of shared dreams and how even today a consummated Bond was something sacred. How some Soulmates could share thoughts and memories and dreams. These tales scare hi. And make him wonder. However he dies his best to ignore them and concentrate on Sharon. She is here and he loves her. It a mantra he repeats to himself everything he dreams of laughter and children with his eyes and sltrawberry blonde hair. He tells himself it is enoughAnd he dares not question why it seems like a lie.

 

 

 

Sharon carter is not stupid. She knows that Steve sometimes wanders in his mind, she knows he must be thinking of the person who wears his Words. After the disaster that was his Words fading and his reaction she would be stupid not to achkowledge it. But she knows he loves her, and she knows they could have it all. She knows they will. And if some days he drifts and is distracted she tries her best to mind. Steve is hers and he is here it stay. She will not lose him to some distant ghost of a Soulmate.

 

 

Both of of them never say the words that decorate his right arm and part of his shoulder. It is an unwritten rule. And the words are: You call that flying? You should see me soar,


End file.
